Good "1 upp'er" or completely untrue stories

tonybolton · Jan 28, 2015

We all know'em.....we've all heard some good ones....now lets enjoy the laughs! You know....the guy with the Cherokee on 31's that climbed cable hill......the old guy that used to have a stock jeep that would climb straight up a wall....THOSE GUYS!

---Guy at work says he has/had a 14ft rat snake living under his house.

---Was informed by a co-worker once that he USED to be a member of Jeff Gordon's pit crew, but was let go because Jeff's wife was hitting on him. (keep in mind his job at the time telling me this he was making 9$ an hour)

---Another co worker....sees I have a screen saver of my dads Cuda and informs me he had a Camaro back in the 80's that would pull the front tires in 2nd gear on the street. I asked him what tires he was running and he said "them TURBO TEC's"

---Pulled up in wifes mothers driveway with my Mustang once and saw one of her punk ass 17 year old cousins there that is into the 240sx/drifting douche phase. I say nothing about my car or what I do. I see him turkey necking at my car and says, "Those are some wide ass tires on there!!!" I say..."Yea...those were the cheapest I could find". He asks, "What are they?" I say, 'They're Nitto NT01's". He nods and says "Cool cool coool....my buddy who is sponsored runs the NT02's" They do not make an NT02.....and he said his friend that is sponsored also works at Wendys flipping burgers.

These are just a few off the top of my head.....i'm sure you guys have some doozies!

5BrothersFabrication · Jan 28, 2015

Guy at work always says, "That boy a mine..." followed by something to one up your claim. Kid is 14 and fat, dad is 37 and fat, sure niether of them are capable of doing half the **** they claimed.

Once worked with a feller, bullshitter taught bullshittin in college. HAD TO. Anyway, dude claim to have worked at Boeing for X years, bounty hunter X years, repo'd cars X years, drove a truck, Air Force, NASA, mechanic... add all that **** up and that 40 year old dude would have to have been in his 70's! And ****in numbers, man. You'd say, "wow, John Force's car- xxx h.p.", he'd say, "well an F-15 has 17,838 h.p." I mean just always with the ****in numbers. He said some **** one day and I quickly said, "You know, 77.369% of statistics are pulled out of a person's ass?" Shut him up for 3,582.5508275 seconds.

tonybolton · Jan 28, 2015

Lol! I've had a bounty hunter at work too!!! Hahaha haha haha haha

Markrobinson · Jan 28, 2015

Then there's always the guys who used to party with skynard. Met a few of those bullshitters. Pretty sure they compared notes too :gtfo:

tyldyl12 · Jan 28, 2015

Re:

I'm sure you've heard of the guy, or guy's dad, who can cut a coke can into, weld it back, and "you can't even tell where he touched it."

CHASMAN9 · Jan 28, 2015

Re:

tyldyl12 said:
I'm sure you've heard of the guy, or guy's dad, who can cut a coke can into, weld it back, and "you can't even tell where he touched it."

And not spill a drop? pics please :dunno:

money_pit_yj · Jan 28, 2015

Dude I'm totally a 1 upper. I hate it but it's like a nervous tic, if you tell a good story, I have to tell one to. I just love telling stories, mine are true but i still have to do it. Its a problem!

pholmann · Jan 28, 2015

Ive gotten to the point where I involuntarily don't listen to **** people say because these kids at the high school are constantly telling **** like the drifting fags and bla bla bla. Ya know the 240 sx with 900 horsepower on 87 octane and their dad they've never met has a real shelby gt 500. Hell maybe he does. Maybe thats why he has never paid child support or seen his kid but maybe a couple times. Who knows. I had one who told me his dad owned the Penn station sub shops here in Knoxville. Turns out the little **** was telling the truth. They hook me up all the time.

I have a buddy, who is much younger than the rest of us so we excuse it, but he cannot hear a story without two upping the damn thing. He was raised by his grandfather and while Ive met him I didn't realize the movie Big Fish was made after him. He has apparently done and seen everything and once he was done seeing it he ****ed it and whooped its ass.

LightBnDr · Jan 28, 2015

Sweet!!
It's amazing to hear some of those stories. Got a guy I see at work once a week who has some crazy outlandish stories of a buddy, it's always a buddy that he knows or lived with and how he whipped 8 guys asses at one time after drinkin a 5th of jack then couldn't remember it the next day.

Always somethin about a fight, he and this dude would fight chuck Norris at parties chuck would beg for his life. Those kinds of things. Silly

CHASMAN9 · Jan 28, 2015

My old neighbor caught a 43lb Largemouth bass. :****:

RIGGHTTT molaugh

money_pit_yj · Jan 28, 2015

As I have gotten older, my stories have become real life experiences. I used to lie like crazy just to keep folks entertained. The problem is I am one of those people who something is going to happen to when they get out of the house. Crazy flocks to me :****:

5BrothersFabrication · Jan 28, 2015

money_pit_yj said:
Dude I'm totally a 1 upper. I hate it but it's like a nervous tic, if you tell a good story, I have to tell one to. I just love telling stories, mine are true but i still have to do it. Its a problem!

Me too, and I'm not trying to one up, I'm just a feller that loves stories. Some people listen and some people listen to the first half of your story while trying to recall this one time that he's about to tell you about. I listen to everybody's story, hell, chances are good that I'm gonna re-tell it.

Actually, if I had the capital, I'd start a TV show called "You ain't gonna believe this ****!" Where it's just a series of 2-4 older fellers coming on TV and telling stories. 100% true, of course. Target audience 30-60 white male.

pholmann · Jan 28, 2015

5BrothersFabrication said:
Me too, and I'm not trying to one up, I'm just a feller that loves stories. Some people listen and some people listen to the first half of your story while trying to recall this one time that he's about to tell you about. I listen to everybody's story, hell, chances are good that I'm gonna re-tell it.

Actually, if I had the capital, I'd start a TV show called "You ain't gonna believe this ****!" Where it's just a series of 2-4 older fellers coming on TV and telling stories. 100% true, of course. Target audience 30-60 white male.

Kinda like people probably didn't believe when we came into work talking about beating the piss out of the crack head that night. That was funny. Ah memories!!

infamous1 · Jan 28, 2015

gonna be some 1 upers tole at the grayrock ride fo sho!!

rek · Jan 28, 2015

tonybolton said:
Lol! I've had a bounty hunter at work too!!! Hahaha haha haha haha

Tony I though you were a bounty hunter. Lol!!!!!

tonybolton · Jan 28, 2015

rek said:
Tony I though you were a bounty hunter. Lol!!!!!

[Thug life]Huntin fa *****,nigga.

[/thug life]

twiztedzuki · Jan 28, 2015

had an old guy that worked on a frame rack at autobody shop tell me he wrote free bird, but someone broke in his car and stole the lyrics :gtfo:

tonybolton · Jan 28, 2015

^^^^^^haha haha haha

toreadorranger · Jan 28, 2015

tonybolton said:
We all know'em.....we've all heard some good ones....now lets enjoy the laughs! You know....the guy with the Cherokee on 31's that climbed cable hill......the old guy that used to have a stock jeep that would climb straight up a wall....THOSE GUYS!

---Guy at work says he has/had a 14ft rat snake living under his house.

---Was informed by a co-worker once that he USED to be a member of Jeff Gordon's pit crew, but was let go because Jeff's wife was hitting on him. (keep in mind his job at the time telling me this he was making 9$ an hour)

---Another co worker....sees I have a screen saver of my dads Cuda and informs me he had a Camaro back in the 80's that would pull the front tires in 2nd gear on the street. I asked him what tires he was running and he said "them TURBO TEC's"

---Pulled up in wifes mothers driveway with my Mustang once and saw one of her punk ass 17 year old cousins there that is into the 240sx/drifting douche phase. I say nothing about my car or what I do. I see him turkey necking at my car and says, "Those are some wide ass tires on there!!!" I say..."Yea...those were the cheapest I could find". He asks, "What are they?" I say, 'They're Nitto NT01's". He nods and says "Cool cool coool....my buddy who is sponsored runs the NT02's" They do not make an NT02.....and he said his friend that is sponsored also works at Wendys flipping burgers.

These are just a few off the top of my head.....i'm sure you guys have some doozies!