pholmann
Well-Known Member
Did your sister lose her virginity in a ford or something? Maybe your girlfriend in high school cheated on you in one? Your a damn broken record. :****:
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Help Support Hardline Crawlers :
Good "1 upp'er" or completely untrue stories
- Thread starter tonybolton
- Start date
tonybolton
Bypass Crawler
Lol....jus eaaaaaassy pickens!
5BrothersFabrication
Zzzzz....
pholmann said:
I've told everybody about that. And the fact that I almost ripped a toe off chasing him down the railroad tracks barefoot, had the worst pain EVER getting it sewn back on the next day.
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onepieceatatime
I like turtles...
Re:
Met a girl once that claimed to be George Jones granddaughter and that her dad was the son of a groupie he banged back in the day. Story seemed pretty legit so I had to bang her just so I could say I did.
Met a girl once that claimed to be George Jones granddaughter and that her dad was the son of a groupie he banged back in the day. Story seemed pretty legit so I had to bang her just so I could say I did.
jayphizzle
Junk Wheeler
Right after 9/11, one of the maintenance guys at a hospital we take care of claimed he got a personal phone call from George W and was informed he was to be on "Red Alert" as his country may need his skillset in the upcoming years. He also had bomb sniffing hounds that he leased to the United States Gubment to make ends meet. All this and he was 60 ish and unclogged toilets for a living. A real life Uncle BS.
onepieceatatime
I like turtles...
Re:
I don't know about you guys but I know my jeep seems to be a magnet for good bullshit stories. Guy at my last job knew a guy that built Sammies. Said he had a stock axle, stock wheel base zuki that would put one tire 6 foot in the air and leave all 3 on the ground.
I don't know about you guys but I know my jeep seems to be a magnet for good bullshit stories. Guy at my last job knew a guy that built Sammies. Said he had a stock axle, stock wheel base zuki that would put one tire 6 foot in the air and leave all 3 on the ground.
5BrothersFabrication
Zzzzz....
Re:
You could take a stock sami axle, lay it on its side on the tire and it wouldn't be 6'.
onepieceatatime said:
You could take a stock sami axle, lay it on its side on the tire and it wouldn't be 6'.
ibrokeit
Brock Higdon- Auburn, AL
Coworker today told me he use to dead lift 1000lb in high school. Before he broke both of his ankles falling off a ladder.
SHELBS44
Frosty beverages and HL2 FTW
- Joined
- May 19, 2014
- Messages
- 812
i got a guy at work who claims to be an ex navy seal. while that's not so far fetched and he is strong as hell some of the stories he tells is what makes you know hes full of it. says in the 90s he had saddam Hussein in his scope and president bush called him and told him not to shoot. but the better one is he has a huge key ring. proabably 50+ keys on it. claims he has a bunker that is full of guns and ammo ranging from 308 to 50 cal and rpgs well that key ring came up missing. a few weeks later said he found it. but someone had stole the key ring cleaned out that bunker then put the key ring back in his work truck later on. well he "knew" who did it caught them and had to torture them to get them to talk. they wouldn't so ehh had to snuff them.
that's just some of the stories he has a wife in the Philippines ( internet bride I might add) awhile back someone supposedly was hacking his computer not letting them talk warning him he was violating homeland security by talking to her so on and so on so he claims to have traced the ip address back to somewhere in bama and them posts all over facebook they didn't know who they were messing with and he was armed to the teeth and prepared to fight the government and blah blah. crazy as hell and for sure on some watch list. all I know is if he ever goes nuts I always try to be nice to him so maybe my ass wont be shot lol
that's just some of the stories he has a wife in the Philippines ( internet bride I might add) awhile back someone supposedly was hacking his computer not letting them talk warning him he was violating homeland security by talking to her so on and so on so he claims to have traced the ip address back to somewhere in bama and them posts all over facebook they didn't know who they were messing with and he was armed to the teeth and prepared to fight the government and blah blah. crazy as hell and for sure on some watch list. all I know is if he ever goes nuts I always try to be nice to him so maybe my ass wont be shot lol
infamous1
Well-Known Member
I used to work with this old dude had a buncha stories too, He was out of work one whole week didn't call or anything when he came back he told the boss the US Govment had called him in to help find Eric Rudolph but they wouldn't listen to him so he quit and came back to work. One of my favorites though he said his girlfriend could go all the way down on his cawk, put a nut in each cheek and slip her tongue in his bung!! thats talent right there!! 
There was a guy here at my work who we all called 'Topper' because he would always top your story with some crazy story. We had a list of them on a word document on a shared drive so we could all add his latest stories to it. He has been gone for a few years or more now. i'll have to see if someone still has a link to the word document.
LandSpeeder
King of the Bammers
I climbed Los Primos with 30" street tires! Woulda gone straight up it had them fatasses not been at the top cock-blockin the trail.
Oh wait! Here's the video!
http://youtu.be/ODML3Yur_9U
Oh wait! Here's the video!
http://youtu.be/ODML3Yur_9U
LandSpeeder
King of the Bammers
drkelly said:
Not trying to Top you.. ( get it?) but we also had a guy we all called Topper! LOL!
Do we work together?! This guy was a contract worker.
TheViking
Targeted
Went to Fire Fighter II with a guy claiming he got shot in the leg by a .50 rifle in the Sand Box..... 
He failed out of boot camp.....
He failed out of boot camp.....
tommy450r
Well-Known Member
The guy that runs the gates at a offroad park near me (sugar creek) always has a crazy story to tell. One time it was a antenna that made enough electricity to power your house just from driving down the road. Last time it was the CIA had a shop hiding kids out an shipping them to a meat processing place an eating them. We had 4 different truck loads of sxs when we pulled in an he told every one of us the same story about eating kids.
money_pit_yj
Well-Known Member
LandSpeeder said:
I drank beer with kid rock.
Nuts
Well-Known Member
I love how most of these start off with "a guy at work" , my guess is thats probably because the guys telling all the **** don't actually have any real friends.
And here's mine. A guy I used to work with in little Franklin Ohio said he painted the snow mans truck and trailer in Smokey and the bandit and has been fighting for his royalty checks for years, this was in 2001.
Another guy, probably 19 years old, fat clumsy and lazy,at a different job said he was an MMA fighter and he gets flown by helicopter to the local casino for all of his fights, and after he wins they have a room full of girl waiting to do whatever he wanted.
And here's mine. A guy I used to work with in little Franklin Ohio said he painted the snow mans truck and trailer in Smokey and the bandit and has been fighting for his royalty checks for years, this was in 2001.
Another guy, probably 19 years old, fat clumsy and lazy,at a different job said he was an MMA fighter and he gets flown by helicopter to the local casino for all of his fights, and after he wins they have a room full of girl waiting to do whatever he wanted.
tonybolton
Bypass Crawler
Seems like we all know some winners!
Stretch
Well-Known Member
"Topper" 
Definitely using that one for the new guy at work that wont STFU. We started calling lunch "Story time" because this ****er has a story for any topic that comes up. Hell I could talk about shotgunnin a beer while suckin a fart out of a strippers ass and he would come back sayin he done it to a bigger stripper while chuggin liquor. Bout a week ago he went on one of his one upper stories and the nicest damn girl in the office just looks at him at the end and goes "cool story bro" and that was it, straight face and all. Man I thought that motherfawker was gonna cry.
Definitely using that one for the new guy at work that wont STFU. We started calling lunch "Story time" because this ****er has a story for any topic that comes up. Hell I could talk about shotgunnin a beer while suckin a fart out of a strippers ass and he would come back sayin he done it to a bigger stripper while chuggin liquor. Bout a week ago he went on one of his one upper stories and the nicest damn girl in the office just looks at him at the end and goes "cool story bro" and that was it, straight face and all. Man I thought that motherfawker was gonna cry.
