Man down.. Man down!! What's the worst pain you ever had??

tallnate · Jul 31, 2015

TacomaJD said:
Damn! I don't want no part of toothaches or kidney stones after readin all them horror stories! :****: :'(

I will have to say I never had any bad pain after my big bike wreck, I was knocked unconscious initially, and drugged like hell the rest of the time, so nothing ever really stuck out as the excrutiating.

However....when I was about 17, I wrecked the hell out of a motocross bike on a dirt (chert) road running about 60mph. wheelied over top of a hill and on the other side, a tree was across the road that blew over the night before. It kicked me over the handlebars and I slid head first down the middle of the dirt road 50-60mph wearing camo pants, cutoff t shirt, helmet and gloves. Had skints and cuts all over, but the main thing that got me was my knees. I guess I was trying to hold myself up off the ground to keep my belly from getting ate up. Wore the skin down to my knee caps, like could see the bone, mangled flesh, bleeding like a stuck hog all over.

I was in the middle of bum fukt Egypt, no cell phone, and by myself...barely could pick the bike up but couldn't kickstart it (no electric start on mx bike) due to the pain in my knees. Ended up pushing it to the ditch and just dropping it (no kickstand either), and started hobbling down the road. After about 200 yds, somebody came by in an El Camino and stopped. They asked if I needed a ride and I said no, just needed cell phone to call my mother. So I called her, told her where I was, and started walking back to where the bike was. She got there in about 15 minutes, picked the bike up for me, kickstarted it for me (go mom!) and I rode it back home while she followed me, blood dripping everywhere. Got home, dumped bike in front yard, got in with her and headed to the ER. They stiched up what they could, and put immobilizers on my legs so I couldn't bend them and the wounds could heal. Had to keep my legs completely straight for 2 months. Ever tried shitting with yer legs straight out in front of you??? Hard as fawk! I remember trying to walk to the bathroom from the couch and it being the worst pain in the world. I had crutches and couldn't even move my legs forward because it would draw up my kneecap and hurt like hell. Mom would crawl on the floor and push my legs forward, one by one.

I've put my parents through hell wrecking motorcycles over the years. I definitely could not ask for better folks to take care of me. Damn, haven't thought about that story in a long time. It sucks balls to be fawked up bigger than **** and being out in the middle of nowhere alone with no cell phone!

And now you're back riding bikes again. Dang dude, you're either insane or you must really love riding. Either way I hope you keep stories like this in your past.

TacomaJD · Jul 31, 2015

tallnate said:
And now you're back riding bikes again. Dang dude, you're either insane or you must really love riding. Either way I hope you keep stories like this in your past.

I love riding more than anything I've ever done. Anybody who is any good at riding has wrecked, multiple times. some worse than others of course. That dirt bike wreck wouldn't have been near as bad, probably not bad at all, had I been wearing motocross gear. Motocross pants are durable as hell, and I highly doubt I would have even had any sort of wounds on my legs if I were wearing them. I would have probably got up, and continued riding. Just one of those things, live and learn.

jeeptj99 · Jul 31, 2015

TacomaJD said:
Damn! I don't want no part of toothaches or kidney stones after readin all them horror stories! :****: :'(

I will have to say I never had any bad pain after my big bike wreck, I was knocked unconscious initially, and drugged like hell the rest of the time, so nothing ever really stuck out as the excrutiating.

However....when I was about 17, I wrecked the hell out of a motocross bike on a dirt (chert) road running about 60mph. wheelied over top of a hill and on the other side, a tree was across the road that blew over the night before. It kicked me over the handlebars and I slid head first down the middle of the dirt road 50-60mph wearing camo pants, cutoff t shirt, helmet and gloves. Had skints and cuts all over, but the main thing that got me was my knees. I guess I was trying to hold myself up off the ground to keep my belly from getting ate up. Wore the skin down to my knee caps, like could see the bone, mangled flesh, bleeding like a stuck hog all over.

I was in the middle of bum fukt Egypt, no cell phone, and by myself...barely could pick the bike up but couldn't kickstart it (no electric start on mx bike) due to the pain in my knees. Ended up pushing it to the ditch and just dropping it (no kickstand either), and started hobbling down the road. After about 200 yds, somebody came by in an El Camino and stopped. They asked if I needed a ride and I said no, just needed cell phone to call my mother. So I called her, told her where I was, and started walking back to where the bike was. She got there in about 15 minutes, picked the bike up for me, kickstarted it for me (go mom!) and I rode it back home while she followed me, blood dripping everywhere. Got home, dumped bike in front yard, got in with her and headed to the ER. They stiched up what they could, and put immobilizers on my legs so I couldn't bend them and the wounds could heal. Had to keep my legs completely straight for 2 months. Ever tried shitting with yer legs straight out in front of you??? Hard as fawk! I remember trying to walk to the bathroom from the couch and it being the worst pain in the world. I had crutches and couldn't even move my legs forward because it would draw up my kneecap and hurt like hell. Mom would crawl on the floor and push my legs forward, one by one.

I've put my parents through hell wrecking motorcycles over the years. I definitely could not ask for better folks to take care of me. Damn, haven't thought about that story in a long time. It sucks balls to be fawked up bigger than **** and being out in the middle of nowhere alone with no cell phone!

You are one tough SOB.

TacomaJD · Jul 31, 2015

****, you never realize how tough you can be until you have no other option!

poolman · Jul 31, 2015

Dam JD, then another wreck takes your leg, and your still riding. I'm trying to figure out if that's balls or no brains! ! :****: :drinkers:

TacomaJD · Jul 31, 2015

poolman said:
Dam JD, then another wreck takes your leg, and your still riding. I'm trying to figure out if that's balls or no brains! ! :****:

I used to ride wild, also had a few more crashes with broke wrist (arm in a cast), bruised ribs, bunch of cuts and rash, etc....Wrecking is how you find limits! Haha molaugh

I've been riding motorcycles since I was old enough to walk. I've slowed down a bit nowadays. 2 main things I miss: Wheelies and track days. Can do neither on a cruiser loser, of which I am confined to due to restricting flexion of my left knee. (can't bend knee far enough to reach the pegs on sportbikes anymore).

LandSpeeder · Jul 31, 2015

TacomaJD said:
I used to ride wild, also had a few more crashes with broke wrist (arm in a cast), bruised ribs, bunch of cuts and rash, etc....Wrecking is how you find limits! Haha I've been riding motorcycles since I was old enough to walk. I've slowed down a bit nowadays. 2 main things I miss: Wheelies and track days. Can do neither on a cruiser loser, of which I am confined to due to restricting flexion of my left knee. (can't bend knee far enough to reach the pegs on sportbikes anymore).

You definitely win this years BADASS MOFO award!

Jacksonwolf39 · Jul 31, 2015

2 weeks ago I cut the inside of my left leg perfectly in between the bone and calf muscle bout 9 inches long and 3 inches deep. On the back of the boat either from the prop or the broken prop guard. But right when it happened I knew what happened... pulled my leg outta water and seen my **** split open and calf hanging. I jump on the back of the boat (yelling any cuss word Incan think of at the moment) my biddy ties my leg together with a tshirt then I jump on the marine police boat and bam the pain hits. Get to the er and I'm feeling alright from all the stuff they pumped in me. Until the dr has to clean it. Half her hand is in my leg rinsing and cleaning it out and fawk I've never felt pain like that in my life. The rails on the side of the bed were cracking from me bout folding them in :****: but been pretty good healing up

smbroady82 · Jul 31, 2015

brokexj said:
I've held my own intestines

woah

pholmann · Jul 31, 2015

Jacksonwolf39 said:
2 weeks ago I cut the inside of my left leg perfectly in between the bone and calf muscle bout 9 inches long and 3 inches deep. On the back of the boat either from the prop or the broken prop guard. But right when it happened I knew what happened... pulled my leg outta water and seen my **** split open and calf hanging. I jump on the back of the boat (yelling any cuss word Incan think of at the moment) my biddy ties my leg together with a tshirt then I jump on the marine police boat and bam the pain hits. Get to the er and I'm feeling alright from all the stuff they pumped in me. Until the dr has to clean it. Half her hand is in my leg rinsing and cleaning it out and fawk I've never felt pain like that in my life. The rails on the side of the bed were cracking from me bout folding them in :****: but been pretty good healing up

I think we need to see pics of this!! Not because I don't believe you, but just because I want to see it. :****:

Jacksonwolf39 · Jul 31, 2015

Hahaha no one had the balls to get a pic of it laid open but I've got a pic somewhere the day after they stitched it up

Jacksonwolf39 · Jul 31, 2015

sexxy · Aug 1, 2015

I had my wisdom teeth surgically removed about 12yrs ago and that was no big deal. The dry socket that followed was worse but nothing ibuprofen during the day and half a painkiller at night couldn't fix. Ive broken bones, even watched as they removed pieces of bone from my thumb. Had a vasectomy almost 3 yrs ago and none of this compares to my back issues. I have a couple bulging disc and when they flare up, I can hardly breathe and trying to move around makes you wish they had to do another vasectomy. My wife will vouche that my back makes life hard on everyone.

Ive never had a kidney stone but my wife has and she says its worse than child birth, and she has birthed 3 kids. She was sicker with the kidney stones that any of the kids.

pholmann · Aug 1, 2015

Jacksonwolf39 said:

That's a ****in gash!!

Beerj · Aug 1, 2015

TacomaJD said:
Ever tried shitting with yer legs straight out in front of you??? Hard as fawk!

Challenge accepted molaugh

kushKrawlin · Aug 1, 2015

Hahah. beerJ i don't think JD means just bending over and touchin your toes and lettin loose. Haha :woot:

kmcminn · Aug 1, 2015

When I was around 13 years old I went with my parents to the funeral home one night. The line was super long so I went out side and was sliding down the steps handrails, not sure what happened but my arm got hung inbetween the rails I fell off and it broke a few inches below wrist. I grabbed my arm held it in place and walked into the funeral home. I stood by behind my parents while they waited in line, gave there condolences to the family. All while not saying a word to them or anyone else cause I knew if I started talking I would be crying. You know how it is when you are a young teenager you definitely don't want to be crying in public. Once we got to the car I let it out though. Probably most pain I have experienced, other than having a sick child and not being able to do anything about it.

kushKrawlin · Aug 1, 2015

Ahhh sliding down that pole musta been the start of your career as a gay stripper?

85toyo · Aug 1, 2015

A guy I grew up with slid down a wooden hand rail and had a huge splinter go through his sack and stuck into his ass cheek. They had to do surgery to get it out.