Am I over reacting?

[fire6945]

could go a little deeper, take your wifes phone, and txt him as your wife saying you don't know why you are worried or so forth, and play it out and see what he says, may be surprising. Got to be a little sneaky to get to the bottom of things, I have and saved my ass a few times. Even some B!tch trying to pin a prego on me years ago.

 

[bad80cj]

Re:

Screen shot and send to his wife. Let her be the judge.

Sent from my XT1049 using Tapatalk

truth
:****:

 

[patman]

If he keeps at it, have your wife setup a "date" in which his wife is waiting on him (with a chaperone)

 

[drkelly]

One more thing. The fact that your wife is showing you all his texts and discussing the situation openly with you should make you feel good that your wife is not even remotely considering cheating on you with him. At least that is the way it comes across to me as you typed it out.

 

[muddinmetal]

One more thing. The fact that your wife is showing you all his texts and discussing the situation openly with you should make you feel good that your wife is not even remotely considering cheating on you with him. At least that is the way it comes across to me as you typed it out.

A good friend of mine's wife was in this situation and showed her husband everything, leading him to believe she could be trusted and would always tell him when something was up.... a year later she left him and moved in with another man :****:

 

[Demo Steve]

Thanks for all the advice so far. Makes me think we are taking the right steps

To make it clear, he does not have her cell #. He is messaging her via facebook. We have screen shot everything he has sent her. He sent her another one this morning about how he was so hurt we would think this of him. Of course my wife instantly felt bad until i pointed out that he still is not including his wife in these messages. He als included his phone # in his message if my wife wants to talk about it. I will be giving him a call after work...

 

[tallnate]

Telling his wife isn't going to fix the problem however I agree, she needs to know. He's already on his 3rd "Baby Momma" with this one right, sounds like he's looking for #4. He has issues and the only way he'll change is if he feels the need to change. You need to confront him about this and ask him to explain why he feels the right to text your wife. These comments are absolutely inappropriate so he can't hide from them or act like he didn't intend for them to be taken that way.. anytime you send a text to someone just to say they were looking good is flirting plain and simple.

 

[fire6945]

I'm telling ya, have her txt him now she has the number. Guarantee that he will start off making it sound like he was all innocent and didn't mean anything, then sometime into the txting he will throw something else out. Then go with it and bust his ass.

 

[muddinmetal]

Agreed, you should start texting him with your phone. If he doesn't know her #, he wont know it's you and see where it goes... $1,000,000 says if you send him a message that said, "whew, I am so glad you sent me your # so we can really talk without my husband seeing it", he would take the bait & run

 

[fire6945]

Yeah, you'd have to nail him hard, if it just gets blowed over" no pun intended" he'll move onto another one in the church. Then he'd become the Bill Cosby of the place.

 

[creepycrawly]

I can't believe you guys are advocating leading him into temptation. The guy was 100% fishing, but y'all are advocating entrapment. There is a difference in stopping something while also making his wife aware and actively trying to entice someone into being unfaithful. Totally different. You gotta be able to sleep with what you are doing at night.

 

[sleepsontoilet]

I can't believe you guys are advocating leading him into temptation. The guy was 100% fishing, but y'all are advocating entrapment. There is a difference in stopping something while also making his wife aware and actively trying to entice someone into being unfaithful. Totally different. You gotta be able to sleep with what you are doing at night.

I kinda agree with this, he was fishing but don't lose your character over it. If you've told his wife and that's the route she takes it, that's different. Have her get a gophone and text her own husband to see what he says. Personally I would bring it up in a private setting in front of all 4 of you. I'm a Christian, but I'm still working on couth.

 

[truckbroke]

100 dollar bill says you tell his wife, show her the messages and it gets turned around on you like you and your wife are the screwed up ones. I`m telling you. Me and another friend told a buddy of ours that his ole lady was cheating he Wouldn`t believe us for nothing. Just stopped talking to us. When it did come out he still don`t talk to us anymore. Guy out here at work was in the same situation as you and they told and showed the dudes wife the messages. She snapped on them saying they left out messages and were just crazy. I`m telling you its a lose lose for ya`ll. Be prepared to walk away either way it goes. When he gets her behind closed doors he`s gonna have her thinking ya`ll are Home Wreckers. Is what it is. Sounds like your wife is being honest with you. As far as her feeling bad that for him, be careful here you can turn into the victom in these situations faster than you want to imagine. Whatever your gonna do, do it and be done. Then it doesn`t hurt to do some checkups from time to time just make sure everything is on the up and ups. It ain`t stuff you wanna hear or even think about but, I`ve seen this stuff play out more than I`d like to admit.

 

[muddinmetal]

If she feels bad for him she has some type of feelings for him :****:

 

[TacomaJD]

Re: Re: Am I over reacting?

If she feels bad for him she has some type of feelings for him :****:

Not necessarily, women are generally sympathetic where men are more cut and dry. Doesn't have to signify evil intent. Depends on surrounding context though. It doesn't sound like there is a trust issue with OP's wife.

And yall are crazy talking that entrapment junk. The barrier has already been broken! That fool needs outted by any means necessary. I probably wouldn't waste the time trying the entrapment thing, but I'd definitely vocalize my thoughts on the matter to the both of them, revealing the messages he sent. Then rid my hands of both of them. If his wife still wanted to be friends with yours, cool. But no more hanging out as couples, because eff that guy!

 

[Bama]

Id hit him right in the damn mouth....

 

[TBItoy]

Re:

Yeah **** trying to "trap" him, that's some highschool bullshit.

 

[kushKrawlin]

Agreed, you should start texting him with your phone. If he doesn't know her #, he wont know it's you and see where it goes... $1,000,000 says if you send him a message that said, "whew, I am so glad you sent me your # so we can really talk without my husband seeing it", he would take the bait & run

I'd bet that also .. No doubt. He's a Fukin Turd. I don't give a fuk if you have known him your whole life.. Ain't no body posed to hit your girl up telling her how good she looks. Fawk that... C'mon now.. Let's be real. Buddy is a piece of ****..
Hell I thought u was talkin bout me at first. Married 2 times, one daughter with first wife.. And now a baby with my current gf/wife.. Hahaha.
But one thing u can bet your nuts on... I don't play them games. That **** gets folks killed.. Daily. My dad can back that up for sure. He had a dude try him up with a broken beer bottle over some girl, late 70'S.. Be amazed at what a .38 special will do to a man's chest.
Rip ole boy #shouldnthavefukedwithSAM #brokehislastbottle #didntgetthegirlback

 

[BigwoolyD]

You confronting him will stop nothing, The only way to put a end to this is for your wife to tell him in no uncertain terms to STOP. All your complaining and threatening is just a jealous husband to him. Ifshe says STOP and he continues then its time for WWIII

 

[bbone]

This reminds me of that one time SteveO messaged one of my ex's...